1/5/77

It's compelling. Why I am drawn
to a "cold, rejecting woman" situation-
is it the dark lady? The one who
must be bad or good, who I must
hate or love to an extreme. I keep
thinking of X looking through the window at
me. She was angry with me- not then, but
for awhile and then she was angry with her mother.

Now work: it's hard to do the 853's
because our schedules do not allow
us enough time with the children-
to get the information.

Probably a mother transference
to the page and to the telephone

Sometimes I go a little further
than I need to with the idea
and this is a plus for writing
I know I really want them to
"call collect" sometimes-

1/9

2 things today-0
1) The Liz W class-
bars-mirrors
2) Gloria B- whose friends are
Puerto Rican- and goes to discos to dance
(has done Ballet- wants to do
jazz)

a play- a dream- a fantasy-
Le Masochiste Extatique-
the play-

1/16

A weekend of "lessons." the murder,
the zen-meditation, Jeannette- "you
would never leave. I think it was the
dog that got to you. Friends are
able to part." Mike and Cheska- Hoboken.
The cardboard sculptures.

What is happening when I feel
"desperately alone?"

The powers of this notebook now. I
write these kinds of thoughts
briefly.

The envelope on the top of the speaker.
Plan, Practice Solitude, Don't Cling,
Choose, Go By What I Perceive

Not deciding the other person is all
good or bad when I cling.

The center of the envelope is Practice Solitude

Tne art of solitude- How to stop being a
people junkie- People who need people
are the luckiest people in the world-