10/10/03

To look to the future in this
way is to expose oneself to the
feeling of *missing
something* (being depersonalized). So in
this evolution of wholeness and identity
which is future oriented there
is also planted the seeds of
doubt. "What have I not yet done?"
The obsessive rumination is
transmuted to "What do I sense in the
present which is the reverberations of
some possible future, which I should
take into account to get a true picture
of the current reality."

In part, it is these possible
futures from which science fiction
draws its themes. It is also
why it is in the future-
oriented narratives-[this way
use 1984] such as Orwell's
*1984* and Huxley's*Brave New World*
offer us a similarly staggering
reaction akin
to the uses of the tragedy in
ancient Greece. We turn
away from mythological past identities
on which we are basing our current ones,
to the speculation about images
of the future, as in the film *On The Beach*.

You can transfer knowledge
from one sphere of your
identity to another and lack
knowledge in one part of the
self which is available in another
part.

Always before me the wish to
begin and the wish to end, to
originate and the wish to [deposit,
master] complete*

*In the instant between discovery and (visual realization)
language moves across the street
from intuition, fantasy & all this is prophetic, the
end point of the beat, to the margin between
physical actualization and imagination. Physical
functioning is impossible without
imagination and the imagination is also
the nexus point of [taste, pleasure and disgust
reactions, the aesthetic, the boundaries
of pleasure and pain]

This reestablishes or finds the continuity of
& the establishment of identity
also has to do with narration
in that the inner ordering of priorities,
the need for certainty, however, is
also the origin of blind belief,
as much as it is the energy
that fuels the need to verify intuitions. It is
this intersection that reveals the
balance implicit in the external
conflict between certainty and doubt.

*Authenticity*

*Visual model of authenticity*(& identity)]


p297- Scientific Explanation

The fragment-promotes the dialectic-
the dynamic interaction of various
subidentities makes it possible for the
overall identity to change yet to
have a continuous essence.

Not only does time not flow,
but every interval consists
of a movement of the pendulum
from the aspect of time which is
eternal (microvallic)
to the aspect of time
which is

Kafka's roach
I=Roach

The experience of having an
identity itself become suspect,
in a world bounded by temporal
endings-w/no infinite

10/18 The narrative

From who is speaking to what is
speaking

10-19-84

The philosophical movement from a multiplicity
of idols to a unitary non-visualizable god
tracks the percpetual movement of a
projection of inner fragments under the
control of a Patriarchal figure (the
Greek Pantheon) to a philosophical vision of
a unified (super) identity.

p.22- Ecrits- Lacan

"Just as the senseless oppression of the superego
lies at the root of the motivated imperatives
of conscience, the passionate desire peculiar
to man to impress his image in reality
is the obscure basis of the rational mediations
of the will."

Omni- Ocober p. 51 "Minsky, in fact
rejects the metaphorical "I" that resides in most
people's heads- Instead he sees the human mind
as a complex organization containing hundreds of individual agents, each
specializing in various functions." p54