3/1985

The narrative-
the site of the narrative- the dream life-Kafka
the Trial- the problem of "reports"
the problem of "official reality" in "1984"
the question of time
Time vs. mass
E=MC2
Both Einstein and Freud apporached the question of time as
[Freud-language] Kafka
Time of life- humankind's history
Birth vs time
time of birth- family history-
history taking- record keeping- recording of
information
exactitude- the obsessional history-
"conventional working"- work/time
artist's time-
experiements in record keeping -[Smithson?]
discovery of anxiety- challenge to security
technology of time- time keeping-
relativity of time- time measured in human intervals
myth-time'"God" time-cosmological time
commonality of Einstein and Freud
turn of the century

the past as a construct
the present as a a construct

Through a compiling of relatively
small-brief-minute descriptions, the
written narrative creates the ilusion of
movement.At least from a visual
standpoint, this universal literary
device is akin to the flip-movie
whereby small shifts in the spacing of an image
creates the illusion of movement.

study-sitting-walking-talking

*This* is where *this* begins, *that* is
where *that* begins.The telling of a
chronological fact combined with the
naming of its progenitor establishes the rhetorical
basis of its authenticity.
From this moment on, the narrative has found its
site by citing (site-cite) the
basis of the narrator's demand
for credence on the reader's part. Simultaneously
the reader is asked to "second the motion" [time
raised to the "second power"?]

The reader's demands for the authenticated
status of the writer's report implies
the reader's recognition of the responsibility she is
taking in this participation. If the
reader is to bring these inscriptions once again to
life and cause them to once again
recreate their being in a living mind, the
reader participates in establishing the verifiability
of this report. However, when the writer is
highly concerned with this implication, it
is likely she will attempt to limit such
demands for credence as much as possible,
simultaneously forgoing the temptation to
speculate and generalize on small bits
of data. Such is the temptation of the
narrative, which, by keeping itself
to relatively small bits
of visualized experience, maintains the
illusion of psychological objectivity. (Quote Goffman)

*
Paranoia- exruciating self-consciousness-
is based ona reasonable observation.
If I am part of a system and I
wish to move into a different position
in that system- the outside will "move"
to block me (as in football)."Winning"
is pushing through this blocking.

The interior mode is similar.
If I wish to push through a blocking
movement inside myself- as I move
towards the "blocked" place something in
me will push me back.

An analogy to this is the "power
struggle." Both of us wants something-
we agree it is terribly important that
we have this- then one of us decides
only one of us can have this. Once one of
us admits we both didn't get it
one of us loses.

As it appears, 5 years ago I put
the poetry aside. I felt beaten
and discouraged. It's easy to get knocked
down again,
once you've been floored.
In every sense- it is the factor of *time*
that provides the perspective.